The Reason Why.

Doubt. It is here in these little moments, when the passion seems to slip away and the excitement turns to stillness, that I begin to question if I can still do this. To give up my belongings, my language, my friends and family, my self and love to the deepest of my potential. 'Cause all I keep doing is wonder if what I will be doing really matters. I am unsure of what the future holds.

Then I find myself spirit slapped by a back-hand from the Almighty

I cannot do this. At least not on my own. I am, and must continue to always be, planted by the stream of life. Rooted and connected to what is real, and true, and life-giving. The true fountain of life.

It is here I am reminded that even though I feel this way, this; thorn in my flesh, can no longer hold me down because when I place HIM first he will take precedence over everything that comes after. Yes, I will doubt and question my purpose (t)here. Yes, I will at times reckon that what I am doing is self-centered; feeling as though I am gaining an exorbitant amount of knowledge and experience while giving nothing in return. I have been there before!. And it is here again I find the answer whispered to me; "simply remember that everyone matters. Act as if everyone deserves better than you."

That means sacrifice.

"Put your life on hold so that other's may be better." Matthew 5 v. 15 (Message)

That is why, the umbrella reason for my going abroad for 2+ years. I believe that I am working within the kingdom of God for a divine purpose. I am (t)here for a reason that is bigger that even I could possibly know or imagine and it scares the devil to death

"No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it for someone else." -Benjamin Franklin